Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

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Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby JS© on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:15 pm

:face:

I guess this is what qualifies at journalism in Ottawa

Matt Cooke was quite focused at Scotiabank Place on Monday morning.

He was focused on that night's game against the Senators. He was focused on helping the Penguins track down the Blackhawks in the overall standings. He was focused on his job as a penalty killer and pest.

Then, after practice, he was focused on the humongous media scrum around his stall in the dressing room.

And he was focused on my package.

Cooke must have read the Ottawa Sun on his way to the rink because something in it clearly had him rattled. And I'm still not sure which part.

After listening to Cooke answer questions about the Feb. 13 incident in which his skate sliced 70% of the way through Erik Karlsson's Achilles tendon, I went to speak with other players in the room about different matters. Like every other reporter there. On the way out, I found Cooke waiting to have a word in private with me.

He wanted to tell me I have no balls. At first I think he said "small balls." But by the time he had finished, and knew Penguins GM Ray Shero was listening, he had decided I had none. Oh, and I believe he also mumbled something about me having no penis before disappearing into the players-only room, which I found interesting.

I will not take this opportunity to, ahem, brag about my manhood.

Cooke accused me of hiding behind the cameras, which is funny. In scrums that large, none of us scribes can get past the guys shooting video. Besides, what exactly would I be hiding from?

Cooke wanted to know why I didn't ask any questions. It's because I only had one, and somebody beat me to the punch. When Cooke held to his story that the Karlsson injury was a "complete freak accident," I'd heard enough.

Again, I don't think he was aiming for Karlsson's Achilles, but I've watched the replay many times and I'm convinced he was either trying to hurt the Senators best player or he was being careless enough with his boot blade to warrant a suspension.

Anyway, I've stated the opinion many times since the incident, and if that was what angered Cooke, well, he must also be pissed at a number of other people, because on this one, I am not a lone wolf.

My best guess is he was mad I pointed out in Monday's column he has averaged less than two fights per season in his NHL career, which isn't many for a guy that plays on the edge that he does. Maybe Cooke didn't like the way I put it -- that he has only settled scores like a man 20 times in his 14 years -- but again, I don't know.


That's the majority of the article. If you want to read the rest of it (which I wouldn't bother): http://www.ottawasun.com/2013/04/22/why ... ns-package
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Letang Is The Truth on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:16 pm

i feel bad for ottawa
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Gaucho on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:18 pm

Sad.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby MarioLives on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:22 pm

Wow, they obsess more about Cooke than Kovy does about my posts..... Joking relax crazy people.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby canaan on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:26 pm

I wish all professions had fights to make other people accountable for their actions. This schmuck would be due for one.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Froggy on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:30 pm

Did he just make up a story in which he was taunted for having small genitals? Seems kinda weird to me
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby MarioLives on Tue Apr 23, 2013 5:50 pm

How can someone have a job after writing this?
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby bh on Tue Apr 23, 2013 6:21 pm

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!
Wow, I haven't had a news article make me laugh like that in quite a while. :lol: :shock: :shock: :lol:
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby jwest21 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 6:23 pm

This is beyond silly...even for The Sun. Basically a sports "journalist" is allowed to accuse Cooke of puposely injuring a player, being less than a man for only fighting some 20-odd times and then talks about his junk. It's not even article on anything other than how this guy hates Matt Cooke.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Kovy27 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 6:29 pm

MarioLives wrote:Wow, they obsess more about Cooke than Kovy does about my posts..... Joking relax crazy people.


I'm no longer allowed to obsess. Sorry. :( I'll miss you!

Image
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby rgj on Tue Apr 23, 2013 6:39 pm

Wow....dude must be a tad sensitive about his li'l bits.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Idoit40fans on Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:09 pm

If what he said is true, why did Cooke care enough to say something specifically to him?
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby MarioLives on Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:26 pm

Kovy27 wrote:
MarioLives wrote:Wow, they obsess more about Cooke than Kovy does about my posts..... Joking relax crazy people.


I'm no longer allowed to obsess. Sorry. :( I'll miss you!

Image


Get the help you need. There are plenty on here who would love your obsession for them. You are special
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Fire0nice228 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:30 pm

Image
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby jwest21 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:34 pm

Idoit40fans wrote:If what he said is true, why did Cooke care enough to say something specifically to him?

Sitting here, Its easy for me to say I'd be the big enough man to just ignore everything. However, being repeatedly accused of something ridiculous would wear on my patience, though, so I could definitely see myself snapping for a second and telling the guy to go have intimate relations with himself.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby jwest21 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:35 pm

Fire0nice228 wrote:Image

Do I even want to know what I am looking at here?
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby DropEmJayBird on Tue Apr 23, 2013 7:39 pm

Some idiot on the NHL radio network talked about Cooke and fighting.

Mentioned that Cooke answered the bell for Savard,

but not for 3 boarding calls and the elbow to the NY Ranger.

I didn't know all boarding calls required a fight.
He was suspended for a ton of games for the elbow.
Having to fight for the Karlsson thing is a joke.

The only way the "Cooke never answers" works is if you count boarding penalties - which is some new thing to me, I didn't know all boarding calls require a fight. Other than that you have an elbow, a shoulder to the head, and some accident.

I think the whole thing with Cooke playing on "the edge" is a bit blown out of proportion. I've seen far more dangerous guys like Ovy and Kronwall cause more damage and do it more often.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Kovy27 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 10:28 pm

MarioLives wrote:Get the help you need. There are plenty on here who would love your obsession for them. You are special


You do know I was being sarcastic...right? Haha.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby pens#1 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 10:41 pm

When will the forensic specialist results be in that the sens owner paid for?
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby RxBandit66 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 10:54 pm

Letang Is The Truth wrote:i feel bad for ottawa


I'll feel bad for Ottawa after the Penguins eat their lunch and sweep them in 4 games in the first round.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Bioshock on Tue Apr 23, 2013 10:55 pm

Tremendous
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby DocEmrick on Tue Apr 23, 2013 11:13 pm

To Canadians, Ottawa is one of the strangest cities.

To Americans, it's even weirder. Trust me, I've visited Ottawa it's literally like something from another planet. The people have really strange "norms" there, and approaching and insulting strangers happens often apparently. Read any travel site and they will corroborate the fact that it's an odd city. As for the city itself, it's like a post-apocalyptic hub where people gather to try and carry on their normal lives. The city itself doesn't have much of a nightlife, and everywhere you go there's usually a stabbing or something.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby pulp22 on Tue Apr 23, 2013 11:37 pm

DocEmrick wrote:To Canadians, Ottawa is one of the strangest cities.

To Americans, it's even weirder. Trust me, I've visited Ottawa it's literally like something from another planet. The people have really strange "norms" there, and approaching and insulting strangers happens often apparently. Read any travel site and they will corroborate the fact that it's an odd city. As for the city itself, it's like a post-apocalyptic hub where people gather to try and carry on their normal lives. The city itself doesn't have much of a nightlife, and everywhere you go there's usually a stabbing or something.


Truth. I was there at a gas station on a road trip. An old man came up to me walking the smallest weirdest dog ever. Long story short he was nice at first and then began screaming at me about American politics. He when from nice crazy to angry crazy for no reason. Got the f out of that town.
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby Idoit40fans on Wed Apr 24, 2013 8:12 am

jwest21 wrote:
Idoit40fans wrote:If what he said is true, why did Cooke care enough to say something specifically to him?

Sitting here, Its easy for me to say I'd be the big enough man to just ignore everything. However, being repeatedly accused of something ridiculous would wear on my patience, though, so I could definitely see myself snapping for a second and telling the guy to go have intimate relations with himself.


Was he reading the guy's articles? I just don't understand what caused him to single him out. I know the dude was writing about him, but why pick him?
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Re: Ottawa journalist: Cooke was looking at "my package"

Postby tfrizz on Wed Apr 24, 2013 8:24 am

Listening to yesterday's Marek vs Wyshynski podcast and they're giving it to Brennan pretty good.
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