Thread of Love 3.0

[ulf]

I've been single for 22 months.
Oy vey...I need to change that.

Like 3 years for me . I made the mistake of liking a girl I'm good friends with and have made no progress lol. /foreveralone

[shafnutz05]

I've been single for 22 months.
Oy vey...I need to change that.

Like 3 years for me . I made the mistake of liking a girl I'm good friends with and have made no progress lol. /foreveralone

I got friendzoned once, but she ended up being a lesbian

[pensfan1989]

[ulf]

I've been single for 22 months.
Oy vey...I need to change that.

Like 3 years for me . I made the mistake of liking a girl I'm good friends with and have made no progress lol. /foreveralone

I got friendzoned once, but she ended up being a lesbian

See I wouldn't call it friendzoned, it's more like.. Yeah nvm friendzoned sounds about right

[newarenanow]

So what's the longest folks here have been married? I've been married for just over 18 years.

EDIT: Cue Rylan: "redwill's been married longer than I've _________ ."

6 years 1 month.

[PensFanInDC]

6 years 5 months

[count2infinity]

-1 year

[CBear3]

7 yrs

[shafnutz05]

3 years and 3 months, but it feels more like a week

[kovyfalcon27]

So I've been dating this girl for about 4 months now. She's great, super sweet, treats me really well and we have a lot of the same interests. I should but happy, so why do all I find myself doing is thinking about my ex who I fought with all the time, had nothing in common with and generally treated me mean? I'm like constantly fighting myself to keep from texting her, why?? WHY!?!?!

[shafnutz05]

So I've been dating this girl for about 4 months now. She's great, super sweet, treats me really well and we have a lot of the same interests. I should but happy, so why do all I find myself doing is thinking about my ex who I fought with all the time, had nothing in common with and generally treated me mean? I'm like constantly fighting myself to keep from texting her, why?? WHY!?!?!

Get your **** head straight. You have a girl that obviously really likes you, and you mean a lot to her. You two have a future together, unless you go screwing it up by trying to reach out to your ex. Next time you start thinking those thoughts, do whatever you have to do to cleanse your mind.

/thread of tough love 3.1

[MRandall25]

I've been single for 22 months.
Oy vey...I need to change that.

Like 3 years for me . I made the mistake of liking a girl I'm good friends with and have made no progress lol. /foreveralone

This is also part of my problem, stemming from the lack of action to begin with.

[newarenanow]

So I've been dating this girl for about 4 months now. She's great, super sweet, treats me really well and we have a lot of the same interests. I should but happy, so why do all I find myself doing is thinking about my ex who I fought with all the time, had nothing in common with and generally treated me mean? I'm like constantly fighting myself to keep from texting her, why?? WHY!?!?!

When you think of the ex, do like that guy in Angel & Demons did and just whip yourself.

[KennyTheKangaroo]

or just say, just because your current girlfriend isnt a total jagoff does not mean you are required to like them.

that doesnt mean your ex is the right person for you

it just means that even though she is nice, that doesnt mean you have to like her.

[Godric]

Or he could just be really curious to see if he can get his Ex back.

[kovyfalcon27]

You all make very good points, I don't really know how to explain it. Most of the girls I've dated in my life have ended up being total whack jobs so maybe I'm just not used to being with someone who is normal??

[pittsoccer33]

So I've been dating this girl for about 4 months now. She's great, super sweet, treats me really well and we have a lot of the same interests. I should but happy, so why do all I find myself doing is thinking about my ex who I fought with all the time, had nothing in common with and generally treated me mean? I'm like constantly fighting myself to keep from texting her, why?? WHY!?!?!

Get your **** head straight. You have a girl that obviously really likes you, and you mean a lot to her. You two have a future together, unless you go screwing it up by trying to reach out to your ex. Next time you start thinking those thoughts, do whatever you have to do to cleanse your mind.

/thread of tough love 3.1

devils advocate here.

you always want what you cant have. simple as that. the more familiar you get with someone the lower your attraction level to her is.

over the summer the best girl i ever dated became engaged. i didnt really care. shes going to be a great wife and mom, but none of that stuff is exciting (well it can be if youre in that stage of life). what is exciting? the thrill of not knowing whether or not the girl youre talking to at the bar is going to go home with you. or in your case whether youre going to make out with your ex again. id be willing to say youre motivated at least on some level by the fear you will never have a physical relationship again like you did with her.

a word about exes though: once their attraction level to you falls below 50% youre done for good. begging for another chance and trying to do nice things for her will only come off as desperate and needy. nobody likes those qualities. living well is the best revenge.

[ulf]

I've been single for 22 months.
Oy vey...I need to change that.

Like 3 years for me . I made the mistake of liking a girl I'm good friends with and have made no progress lol. /foreveralone

This is also part of my problem, stemming from the lack of action to begin with.

I just need to man up. Been afraid of what might happen if she doesn't approve, since there's only a few of my friends left around town anyway. down with the friend zone.

[pittsoccer33]

wanna get out of the friend zone? dinner at your place and potentially wine.

there is absolutely no reason to be afraid to make a move on a girl. you will be no worse off than you were before. and now with twilight and 50 shades of grey every girl is a little bit crazier

[MRandall25]

you will be no worse off than you were before.

Disagree.

[npv708]

So what's the longest folks here have been married? I've been married for just over 18 years.

EDIT: Cue Rylan: "redwill's been married longer than I've _________ ."

1 year, 5 months.

[obhave]

I doubt many of you remember my story fro Thread of Love 1.0, but I now have another dilemma dealing with the same guy.

Basically, we decided to stay good friends instead of entering into a relationship. He decided upon returning to school to get back with the ex that cheated on him.

Here is the problem - the girl cheated on him again this past weekend at a party I was at. She told me the following day that if I ever told him that she would make my life a living hell and ruin my friendship with him. I am the only one of our extended friend group that was there. Its a bad situation because our relationship is already strained since he got back with her and I don't want him to think I made this up because that is how she would twist it. How would you more mature folk suggest I go about this?

[ulf]

Tell him and if he really trusts her over you then I wouldn't say it's worth being great friends with him anyway.

[newarenanow]

I doubt many of you remember my story fro Thread of Love 1.0, but I now have another dilemma dealing with the same guy.

Basically, we decided to stay good friends instead of entering into a relationship. He decided upon returning to school to get back with the ex that cheated on him.

Here is the problem - the girl cheated on him again this past weekend at a party I was at. She told me the following day that if I ever told him that she would make my life a living hell and ruin my friendship with him. I am the only one of our extended friend group that was there. Its a bad situation because our relationship is already strained since he got back with her and I don't want him to think I made this up because that is how she would twist it. How would you more mature folk suggest I go about this?

To me, if you were truly a friend, I'd tell him. One of three things will happen:

1) He will believe you, confront the girl and get rid of her. She may try to make your life miserable for a little bit, but will get bored and move on. I wouldn't let it bother you either.

2) He won't believe you, he will believe her, and you may lose out on your friendship for a little while. They will be together, she will cheat on him again, and he will either come back to wanting to be friends with you, or he will just fade off, which in the long run, you'll forget about. (there are a lot of friends I thought I'd be friends with forever at a young age (ie. teens, early 20s) that I did stupid stuff for who I don't even talk to anymore).

3) He may not believe you, do his own investigating, and then come back and thank you and your friendship will be fine.

If you don't tell him, and he finds out, and finds out you knew, he will hate you.

[ulf]

you will be no worse off than you were before.

Disagree.

yeah i don't know. crap could get weird if the "friend" had no idea the guy felt that way.