Jagr to BOS

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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby HomerPenguin on Thu Aug 09, 2012 1:39 pm

Jagr's Journal, 27 July 2012

Terrible thing happen to Jagr this day. Jagr had made special middle of week journey to Jagr's most joyous place in world, Trump Taj Mahal in Atlantic City, followed by extended return trip while fleeing from figures of mafie who for some reason seek Jagr's repayment of borrowed funds. When Jagr finally return home to Philadelphia, find house in shambles, many valuable possession taken, such as Jagr's preserved hair clippings, several *NSYNC small discs, and Furby that Jagr bring to bed every night after Slovakian supermodel is escorted off premises. Also, Jan nowhere to be found. Jagr fear worst, that Jan has been killed by criminal and his bloods will have ruined Jagr's hardwoods floor, but this is not so. Unfortunately Jagr also find that Kip is still remaining in house, his broken body (at hands of darebák Crosby) leaving him unable to move. Kip reveal horrible truth, that criminal culprit was Jagr's former despota coach, Kevin Constantine, who also leave note for Jagr, say maybe now Jagr play some defense for a change, and also leave behind several of his Kevin Constantine's Total Hockey instructional videos for some reason. I ask Kip why he and Jan not stop this mizera Constantine from steal from Jagr, but neužitečný fool Kip make some excuse about his inability to move broken body. Is unclear if Jan has been kidnapped, but Kip did hear Jan begging Constantine for morsel of food or cup of clean water, so is possible that Constantine takes pity on that kříženec and takes him away voluntarily. Situation very dangerous now, Jagr may have no choice but to pay for medical treatment for Kip's many injuries despite Jagr's strong feeling that Jagr does not want to do this.

Hair alone is priceless, but Jagr have to give value for pojišťovací agent so that he may compensate Jagr for his loss. Jagr value hair at $15 millions, discs at $500,000, Furby at $4.5 millions, subtract $3 millions for Constantine taking that debile Hrdina off Jagr's hands.

Constantine and Hrdina last seen somewhere in Montreal, out of Jagr's reach, but Jagr very close personal friend of Mario Lemieux who is native of this region. Perhaps Jagr call Mario, ask him maybe he want Jagr to play for Penguins next season? Then Mario can help Jagr to capture this Constantine and retrieve his stolen hairs.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby nocera on Thu Aug 16, 2012 7:49 pm

Image


Somethings... off
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lesky on Fri Aug 17, 2012 8:30 am

Is that a Koho jersey he is wearing?
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Tomas on Wed Sep 19, 2012 10:59 pm

Another season, another blog. The first as the Kladno Knight:
http://isport.blesk.cz/clanek/isport-cz ... ximum.html
(Google translated)

So, now I'm Knight. And I promise to give you the maximum

Again greet you all with my regular column. If the NHL started in time, as it should, at this time I would be going overseas and the season in Dallas. But those plans thwarted lockout and no one knows when the league gets going again.

On the one hand, I am sorry, because at my age it is a pity everyone match that of the NHL come. And then there will be no fun to jump into it again. But nothing can be done, I take it as reality. You always need to think positive, so I am pleased that I can get on some time for our Knights. About no other options during the lockout, I even considered, it is clear.

And now we have ahead of Wednesday's match at the O2 Arena against Slavia. What I know, was just the ticket on Monday great interest, which I'm obviously very happy. Everywhere erodes, that in 2004 the hall was sold out and everyone is curious to see if this works again. Yeah, I should happy about it, but there was nothing ahead guaranteed. I am a realist. Moreover, not Crosby or Malkin, with them it would be easier ...

Anyway, will be great when fans arrive as much as possible. When we then Sazka Arena played eight years ago, we were guests as Kladno. This time we will be home, so we can accommodate more than just our fans. And because we did, we want to indulge in comfort. And I can promise them that we as Knights to give the maximum. Mainly it will be an experience for our younger players who have never had the chance to play in front of so many people.

Probably from me waiting for enough people, well let's see ... The fact is that I do not consider themselves the only preparatory match for Overseas regulím I could not get on. But there's nothing you can do about it. I know that I hand maximum. And if it be enough? That's another thing ...

It is true that I had in the last few days a lot of worries.
The biggest problem is the incredibly high fuse. When I learned the amounts that nearly had me omejvat. For our budget figures are huge, so we were worried that we do not somehow able to solve.

We face off against Slavia, I want to thank that has been very accommodating. Like other teams, which are still at the O2 Arena will compete. It should take against us and Cervus (Roman Cervenka), so I wonder what his show. At least see if it got to worry when we compete against each other in the NHL.

I must still return to a Saturday event looking for new Knight, which we organized together with the people of Sport. I must say that I loved it and I came upon it on a completely different idea. When one sees that makes children happy, it gives it a lot of energy. And right now there a lot of need. So once again congratulations to winners, but not only them. Thanks to all who came. I was really pleasantly surprised at how many talented children there appeared.

On the Web iSport.cz then I saw claimed in interviews that they will from that moment, what with me zatrénovaly, more at home practicing. One thing is what they say about someone with a microphone in hand, but the main thing is to make them last. And now comes the important role of parents is to cleverly and positively motivated.

On Wednesday at the O2 Arena in sight! And then of course on Friday with us at Kladno.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lesky on Tue Sep 25, 2012 10:24 am

How about renaming this thread: "Jaromir Jagr discussion thread"?
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby canaan on Tue Sep 25, 2012 12:00 pm

Lesky wrote:How about renaming this thread: "Jaromir Jagr discussion thread"?

whats the fun of that?
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lesky on Wed Sep 26, 2012 5:49 am

canaan wrote:
Lesky wrote:How about renaming this thread: "Jaromir Jagr discussion thread"?

whats the fun of that?


Its not fun but a better thread title in the present times!
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lesky on Mon Oct 01, 2012 1:32 pm

What will happen to Jagrs contract with Dallas if the entire season is wiped out?

Does it run next year or what happens?
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby HomerPenguin on Thu Oct 04, 2012 2:19 pm

Jagr's Journal, 04 October 2012

Jagr is with you, not as hockey player in America for lockout but happily in possession of Jagr's stolen properties which were taken from Jagr by darebák Kevin Constantine some months ago. Very strange to Jagr, very close personal friend Mario Lemieux does not aid Jagr in tracking thief to Montreal even with Jagr's assurances that such deeds would encourage Jagr to perhaps return to play for Pittsburgh in some future time. Instead Constantine himself contacts Jagr, seeking to return zbytečný Jan but also willing to give other Jagr's things back if Jagr paint his garage for some reason. Obviously Jagr does not wish to do this, but very much wanted goods returned and so Jagr throw Kip's still-broken body (make reparations for your war crimes, terorista Crosby!) into paints and sort of roll him around garage, finish rychle with only minor inconvenience of Kip's ustavičný screaming in pains.

Jagr very pleased to possess former clipped hairs again, also Furby and other items, however this is great problem also. Jagr's insurance company now want returned the US $17 millions that Jagr value all items at, simply because items are no longer gone! What kind of hovadina is this? Jagr's compliance in this is not even possible, because day after insurance check arrives Jagr places $17 millions bet on keno at Tropicana Atlantic City, Jagr needs big win to pay various věřitelé, but amazingly Jagr does not become victorious in this. Even worse, Constantine insist on returning Jan along with stolen items, so Jagr is now again responsible for providing floor space and toilet for both Jan and Kip (even though Jagr does not wish this in any way), and without checks from National Leagues Hockey of Dallas this is simply not possible. This insurance company will have to eat its own junk.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby mnpensfan on Fri Oct 05, 2012 4:28 pm

HomerPenguin wrote:Jagr's Journal, 04 October 2012

Jagr is with you, not as hockey player in America for lockout but happily in possession of Jagr's stolen properties which were taken from Jagr by darebák Kevin Constantine some months ago. Very strange to Jagr, very close personal friend Mario Lemieux does not aid Jagr in tracking thief to Montreal even with Jagr's assurances that such deeds would encourage Jagr to perhaps return to play for Pittsburgh in some future time. Instead Constantine himself contacts Jagr, seeking to return zbytečný Jan but also willing to give other Jagr's things back if Jagr paint his garage for some reason. Obviously Jagr does not wish to do this, but very much wanted goods returned and so Jagr throw Kip's still-broken body (make reparations for your war crimes, terorista Crosby!) into paints and sort of roll him around garage, finish rychle with only minor inconvenience of Kip's ustavičný screaming in pains.

Jagr very pleased to possess former clipped hairs again, also Furby and other items, however this is great problem also. Jagr's insurance company now want returned the US $17 millions that Jagr value all items at, simply because items are no longer gone! What kind of hovadina is this? Jagr's compliance in this is not even possible, because day after insurance check arrives Jagr places $17 millions bet on keno at Tropicana Atlantic City, Jagr needs big win to pay various věřitelé, but amazingly Jagr does not become victorious in this. Even worse, Constantine insist on returning Jan along with stolen items, so Jagr is now again responsible for providing floor space and toilet for both Jan and Kip (even though Jagr does not wish this in any way), and without checks from National Leagues Hockey of Dallas this is simply not possible. This insurance company will have to eat its own junk.


Ribs hurt from laughing so hard while reading this. Had more than a few people walk by my office and asking me if I was ok with me practically in tears from laughing so hard reading the journal entries. So glad I clicked back on this thread again....good work :lol:
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Tico Rick on Sat Oct 06, 2012 10:19 am

Jagr's Journal is pure gold! :thumb: Homer!
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lt. Dish on Sun Oct 07, 2012 12:45 am

The Furby saga is some hilarious hovadina, Homer.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Tomas on Thu Oct 18, 2012 1:48 am

New blog:
http://isport.blesk.cz/clanek/hokej-kon ... doval.html
Hasan and end at the top? I do not accept it, with nothing nehazardoval

This time I can not write about anything other than Dominik Hasek, who finally ended the career. This is the main home - hat off to what he could. It is one of the best goalkeepers in the history and in the world of Czech hockey incredibly famous.

I will never forget how fielded at the Olympics in Nagano. For me, no one never fails to shine as an individual in this collective sport. It was incredible.

His career in the NHL was amazing, even though overseas came later in life, thus forcing others to change their style. It was an incredibly powerful that can read the game. Quickly analyze everything and immediately decided what to do.

It would be useless to repeat what has had successes. Rather, I stopped at present, and that in the NHL, I do not find any team. Honestly - for bosses clubs is terribly difficult question goalkeeper, the goalkeeper is the only one. If you took the attacker and clicks it, nothing happens. So do the defenders. But with the goalie? That's the trouble, if it does not work. Therefore, every careful.

The owner of the club must consider all the circumstances. That is why I now need to Kladno during the lockout did not Ondra Pavelce, even though I know it's great. We gave Honza Chabera confidence, because we know how it is very sensitive, if you do post on this change.

Hasan would go to the farm, but also there is a problem. On farms they want to give a chance to younger, to get the full experience. Because how else are they to get over the fact that they catch?

It is clear that Hasan got huge respect. And I certainly do not agree with voices that gambling with your name, making several return. These speeches are stupid. Or, it should be at the top end. Why? If it were so, it would be like one who is over twenty-five years, he did not have the right to live? When properly man knows that it is on top?

When he likes something, why should not it do next? Have to worry about what to say to others? I do not accept this. It is like when someone walks in his youth like to go through the forest and suddenly at the age would have said it was him at the feet hurt terribly, you'd better not go anywhere. After all, that's ****. He loved hockey, gave him everything.

Just be sure to not go somewhere to skate. When he felt he could turn very well prepared, and find out if it is not a concern, why not do it? In addition, he after many times already announced the end of their careers, something always won. Maybe last won the title with Pardubice, when he was 45 years old. That's a wonderful thing.

I take this view: It's always better to go on the ice with the fact that I was a little worse than the other, than sitting in a pub and making clever as I used to be good in the past. So I'm not surprised that it still wanted to continue, when it felt.

Hasan you probably did not want to wait, so decided this. Ends. Which certainly can not erase what hockey did. For all this he must be applauded.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby JS© on Thu Oct 18, 2012 9:35 am

Lesky wrote:Is that a Koho jersey he is wearing?


Yes it is. I don't think the Stars have worn that style of jersey since '04.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby HomerPenguin on Fri Oct 19, 2012 12:17 pm

Jagr's Journal, 19 October 2012

Jagr is still in very křehký emotional station, with many issues currently clouding Jagr's lifestyles. In positive side, Jagr has returned to play for hometown club in Kladno, which mean Jagr is safely out of reach of many interests in United States which seek nespravedlivý reparations for many debts incurred in Jagr's times in Atlantic City and other such locations. Unfortunately, as Jagr is well aware, several such interests also exist inside Česká republika, and so Jagr have merely traded one irritation for same irritation in other language.

In additionally, Jagr is still recovering from trauma of theft of possessions by Constantine, as well as untimely return of that pijavice Jan who had gone with Constantine. Although Jagr is happy to have once again Jagr's hair clippings, Furby, as well as NSYNC albums, Jagr does not any longer feel protection within his own houses. Jagr attempt solution to this problem, call woman who is former Miss Slovakia, lady companion and also claim to be trauma counselor, but as soon as she see Kip lying useless on Jagr's floor with his závažný injuries, she berate Jagr for choosing to hire prostitutka/trauma counselor rather than pay to treat Jagr's friends wounds and allow him to rest in an actual bed rather than on floor. This is complete hovadina! For first thing, Kip is not friend of Jagr, he is worthless pijavice just like Jan who take everything from Jagr such as toilet use and crust of bread and does not even pass the puck to Jagr in all occasions as he is required! In second places, Kip is not lying on floor, because Jagr put down towels below him to catch his moč before it stain Jagr's hardwoods! Jagr explain to woman that Kip is pleased to serve Jagr in this manner, but she leave anyway for some reason. Zatraceně, Crosby! Your war crimes are ruining Jagr's life! Jagr then call close personal friend Mario Lemieux, in effort to unburden Jagr's pains and perhaps express desire to play again for Pittsburgh hockey club, but find that phone number Jagr possesses no longer belong to Mario. Very strange.

But this is not only reason for Jagr's upsets, for now Jagr must read vile slanders of Jagr's name and sayings that Jagr and other LHN players in Europe are putting local players out of works. This is some real blbost against Jagr and must be eliminated. Local players will benefit from Jagr's presence among them as Jagr benefited from time playing with men such as Paul Coffey and close personal friend Mario Lemieux, although not from time playing with Ron Francis as he is bába and useless for Jagr's development. The young Czech players who are privileged to join ice with Jagr today will benefit from Jagr's teachings and if learn to pass the pucks to Jagr in every situation, then perhaps they could take place of tuláci like Jan and Kip and then Jagr will also see benefits from this. Jagr has benefited many young players in the years, from Chris and Peter Ferrarro to Hans Jonsson to Maxime Ouellet to that time Jagr tip weight machine over on top of tiny trpaslík Marty Straka. Which rising Czech player will find fortune to have Jagr shove weight machines on to him this season? We must wait and see!
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Sam's Drunk Dog on Fri Oct 19, 2012 12:37 pm

:thumb:
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Sam's Drunk Dog on Sat Oct 20, 2012 8:30 pm

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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Tomas on Mon Oct 22, 2012 11:29 pm





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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Tomas on Thu Oct 25, 2012 12:05 am

120 kg of solid wood:

Image

Image
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Sam's Drunk Dog on Thu Oct 25, 2012 7:05 am

It makes sense that Jagr is a Yankees fan.
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby DudeMan2766 on Thu Oct 25, 2012 12:08 pm

Jagr poses next to a statue of his hero Scott Hall
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lesky on Sun Oct 28, 2012 1:25 pm

So how is Jagr doing in the Czech league thus far?
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Lesky on Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:42 pm

Jagr hattrick!

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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Sam's Drunk Dog on Mon Oct 29, 2012 10:01 pm

Jagr hat trick
1. Score goal
2. Pull groin
3. Lose $1M at blackjack
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Re: Jagr to PHI

Postby Tomas on Tue Nov 06, 2012 12:26 am

Today, from the "celebrities" section:

This time, it lasted 6 years (his "personal best"):
http://www.blesk.cz/clanek/celebrity-ce ... etech.html

"Career path":
http://www.ahaonline.cz/clanek/sport/79 ... jkova.html
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