Froggy wrote:My 2 best friends are a married couple. They just told me they are splitting up. I'm not downplaying how much this sucks for them and their kids.
But it sucks for me, too. It's gonna get all kinds of awkward because the way they split wasn't amicable.
Basically, the last few months, she has been going out doing graffiti and getting high with a bunch of shady dudes. He expressed his displeasure at this, since they have kids, and she is in her 30s and should be over this stuff.
So last month she got arrested, and it was the last straw. He gave her an ultimatum, and she walked.
It sucks to see marriages end, and it sucks worse when they end from people being selfish.
I call it emotional vertigo... people tend to all of sudden lose their emotional balance.
I've learned the hard way. The best thing to do, is not argue, don't engage. whether the person realizes it or not, what they want is for the stable person to be "the bad guy" and act from emotion.
Let them go, you're going to get hurt, you're going to be taken advantage of. Everyone loses in a divorce. The physical things can be replaced (Even if it takes years). But the worst thing is to wake up in the middle of the night, years later, with regrets about the way you handled it. (I know first hand).
Believe it or not, sometimes these folks get grounded again. If you really love them, let them go... (It's a trite phrase, but like many trite phrases, it has a lot of truth to it)
Edit: I do agree with canaan... Get an Attorney.. NOW. Let the attorney be the bad guy. (Sorry Shyster)