Jagr's Journal, 4/13/13
Jagr must write only a short update to his fans this day. As all who follow the new of the LHN are aware, Jagr is now a Boston Bruins of LHN. Believe Jagr, this was not easy decision. Jagr waited as long as possible to see if Jagr's lifelong brother and number one fan, Mario Lemieux of Pittsburgh LHN club, could regain his mind and defeat the tyrant Shero who has prevented Jagr's great return to the city that loves Jagr above all others. Jagr can only imagine that Penguins fans will tear this uchvatitel
Shero's head from his body now that they have no chance of seeing Jagr there this season. Perhaps Jagr will return there in the offseason, yes? Jagr will always wish to play for this club so much. Anyway, Jagr is pleased to play for Boston club because it will make playoff play, and this Jagr's debts to figures of organizovaný zločin
will not be increased. Jagr looks forward to new teammates giving him the puck at all times. Jagr does not know who they are, because it is not worth Jagr's time to learn their names when Jagr will probably not be there after this season, you see?
Relocation to Boston was somewhat inconvenient for Jagr only because with Kip in such medical condition, shattered bones healing out of place and the like, Jagr was forced to fly with him as checked luggage instead of have him walk as Jan has done. This costs Jagr $50 because of some airplane hovadina
which is ridiculous because Jagr explains to airline that it is Jagr, yet they make no accommodations in this? Eat your own underwear, airline!
Jan make another big complaint about having to walk from Dallas to Boston, tells Jagr he is "starving to death" and "dying alive," which is some other hovadina
which does not even make sense and Jagr cannot understand what Jan means in this. Jagr is forced to activate Jan's shock collar again, which wears down battery and brings more quickly the time when Jagr will have to pay for replacement batteries. These worthless služebníci
are bleeding Jagr's funds dry with small costs.
Jagr would also like to congratulate trpaslík Martin Straka (this is his name, yes?) for reaching Czech League finals
. This tiny man has achieved something from back when Jagr was throwing weights machines on top of him in the tělocvična
. Obviously Straka understands that if Jagr were still in Czech Republic this achievement for him would be impossible, but the next time Jagr returns to that kůlna
will not be until Jagr has accumulated vast quantities of golds and silvers from his karban