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Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Gaucho on Tue May 14, 2013 11:10 am

Any good ones out there? Just heard this one on twitter: Melnyk had CSI analyse the Apollo landings as he thought it looked like Wisconsin.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 11:20 am

Matt Cooke was the second gunman on the grassy knoll.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 11:21 am

Matt Cooke has the cure for cancer, but refuses to disclose it in order to make money off medical and prescription drug expenses.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby jwest21 on Tue May 14, 2013 11:27 am

Matt Cooke is in al-Qaeda
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby DocEmrick on Tue May 14, 2013 11:28 am

A secret cabal controls the NHL, and Matt Cooke is one of the ancient bloodlines.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby darkstar57 on Tue May 14, 2013 11:33 am

Matt Cooke is really big foot
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby silentom on Tue May 14, 2013 11:34 am

Matt Cooke is an Illuminati.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 11:35 am

Matt Cooke was behind and orchestrated all the recent episodes of gun violence in the US to manufacture a public desire to ban automatic weapons.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby AlexPKeaton on Tue May 14, 2013 11:36 am

Matt Cooke is really dead.

Image
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby CERV96 on Tue May 14, 2013 11:39 am

Matt Cooke convinced George Lucas to sell Star Wars to Disney
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Idoit40fans on Tue May 14, 2013 11:46 am

:pop: Matt Cooke/Melnyk jokes are low hanging fruit, be better than this.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 11:47 am

Matt Cooke took the joy out of Idoit40fans.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby tscottw56 on Tue May 14, 2013 11:47 am

Wasn't Matt Cooke in Boston that very day? Hmmmmmm?
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Gaucho on Tue May 14, 2013 11:50 am

I was hoping for less Cooke and more Melnyk. pop
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 11:51 am

Gaucho wrote:I was hoping for less Cooke and more Melnyk. pop


Too bad.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby DocEmrick on Tue May 14, 2013 11:52 am

Gaucho wrote:I was hoping for less Cooke and more Melnyk. pop


Either way, it's all one giant conspiracy and everyone's in on it. Except Melnyk.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 11:55 am

Melnyk just doesn't get any respect I tell ya...

Image

Spoiler:
Image
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby pfim on Tue May 14, 2013 12:04 pm

sil wrote:Matt Cooke is Idoit40fans.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Sam's Drunk Dog on Tue May 14, 2013 12:09 pm

Melnyk believes that penguins are really aliens in disguise.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby sil on Tue May 14, 2013 12:15 pm

pfim wrote:
sil wrote:Matt Cooke is Idoit40fans.


I could believe that too.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Idoit40fans on Tue May 14, 2013 12:21 pm

pfim wrote:
sil wrote:Matt Cooke is Idoit40fans.


This chills my heart. Thats a good thing.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Eismann on Tue May 14, 2013 12:37 pm

Matt Cooke stole Michael Jackson's other glove and used it to shoot J.R. from the grassy knoll on Easter Island when the Mayan calendar expired.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Eismann on Tue May 14, 2013 12:41 pm

Melnyk hires forensic scientist to prove that, confirming popular disbelief, it really _is_ butter.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Eismann on Tue May 14, 2013 12:46 pm

I gotta get Melnyk to hire a forensic scientist to find the real killer.

Respectfully,

Orenthal.
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Re: Melnyk Conspiracy Theories

Postby Idoit40fans on Tue May 14, 2013 12:49 pm

Eugene Malnyk figured out who killed Rosie Larsen.
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