Rylan's Thread of Personal Committed Relationships

[MalkinIsMyHomeboy]

I wonder if Godric ever hooked up with that porn star?

MalkinismyHomeboy wrote:

She never gave me the time of day.

I don't want Del Zotto's sloppy seconds

[mikey287]

a lot of it is just getting lucky

woot

at this.

[obhave]

I have a friend who is really in a funk right now in regards to girls. He has been single for a while and wants to find someone. He refuses to find a hookup with tinder, nor will he do the online dating thing. When we go out to a bar he just sits and mops, refusing to interact with anyone, yet complains all night about not meeting anyone new. I've even chatted up some girls for him (that he pointed out as cute) and he didn't even utter a word.

My question... Is there anything I can suggest to him to get him out of the funk? I'm not sure what else I can do as a wing-woman at this point.

[MalkinIsMyHomeboy]

After you guys go out, do you ask him why he didn't talk to any girls?


I don't know what your friendship is with him, but if I had a friend like that I'd be extremely blunt and tell him to either "nut up or shut up". But I'm that kind of person so yeah

[obhave]

He just grumbled at me, gave no straight answer. Which is why I'm at a loss as to how to help anymore.

[mikey287]

Do you have any girlfriends with a common interest as him or similar personality? Sometimes just a dinner/drinks 2 on 2 can yield a good, positive conversation and kind of gain momentum for an individual...2 on 2 allows for him not to have to be the showman, but he can get involved without a lot of pressure...

Overall though, you gotta make your own breaks...

[Idoit40fans]

Is he going out just to go out with friends or to go out to meet someone? I never went to the bar with the idea of meeting someone. He should be focusing on going out, having fun with friends and just talking with people. If he meets someone, great, if not that should be great too. The bar scene is way better when you're out with no particular goal in mind other than spending time with friends and having fun.

Also, i'm pretty sure girls are going to have a lot more interest in you when you're just having a good time rather than acting sad and desperate.

[obhave]

Do you have any girlfriends with a common interest as him or similar personality? Sometimes just a dinner/drinks 2 on 2 can yield a good, positive conversation and kind of gain momentum for an individual...2 on 2 allows for him not to have to be the showman, but he can get involved without a lot of pressure...

Overall though, you gotta make your own breaks...

Maybe this will work. It will at least get him talking to someone single, with less pressure than random people at the bar, help him get some more confidence.

[Grunthy]

Is he going out just to go out with friends or to go out to meet someone? I never went to the bar with the idea of meeting someone. He should be focusing on going out, having fun with friends and just talking with people. If he meets someone, great, if not that should be great too. The bar scene is way better when you're out with no particular goal in mind other than spending time with friends and having fun.

Also, i'm pretty sure girls are going to have a lot more interest in you when you're just having a good time rather than acting sad and desperate.

unless he likes goth girls.

[Pavel Bure]

You can't save people like that obhave. They gotta fix themselves before they'll be pod for anyone. I have a friend exactly like this and I tried for years to help him. They're just broken in some way they need I work out. Don't worry yourself too much about it.

[Chefpatrick871]

I have a friend who is really in a funk right now in regards to girls. He has been single for a while and wants to find someone. He refuses to find a hookup with tinder, nor will he do the online dating thing. When we go out to a bar he just sits and mops, refusing to interact with anyone, yet complains all night about not meeting anyone new. I've even chatted up some girls for him (that he pointed out as cute) and he didn't even utter a word.

My question... Is there anything I can suggest to him to get him out of the funk? I'm not sure what else I can do as a wing-woman at this point.

Can I inquire about your aforementioned wing woman services?

[obhave]

I have a friend who is really in a funk right now in regards to girls. He has been single for a while and wants to find someone. He refuses to find a hookup with tinder, nor will he do the online dating thing. When we go out to a bar he just sits and mops, refusing to interact with anyone, yet complains all night about not meeting anyone new. I've even chatted up some girls for him (that he pointed out as cute) and he didn't even utter a word.

My question... Is there anything I can suggest to him to get him out of the funk? I'm not sure what else I can do as a wing-woman at this point.

Can I inquire about your aforementioned wing woman services?

Do you want me to be your wing woman? I wouldn't suggest it, apparently it didnt work so well for my friend hah

[KennyTheKangaroo]

I have a friend who is really in a funk right now in regards to girls. He has been single for a while and wants to find someone. He refuses to find a hookup with tinder, nor will he do the online dating thing. When we go out to a bar he just sits and mops, refusing to interact with anyone, yet complains all night about not meeting anyone new. I've even chatted up some girls for him (that he pointed out as cute) and he didn't even utter a word.

My question... Is there anything I can suggest to him to get him out of the funk? I'm not sure what else I can do as a wing-woman at this point.

suggest to him that everyone, EVERYONE hates sitting around with a mope that whines about their own bad luck with women.

[CBear3]

I have a friend who is really in a funk right now in regards to girls. He has been single for a while and wants to find someone. He refuses to find a hookup with tinder, nor will he do the online dating thing. When we go out to a bar he just sits and mops, refusing to interact with anyone, yet complains all night about not meeting anyone new. I've even chatted up some girls for him (that he pointed out as cute) and he didn't even utter a word.

My question... Is there anything I can suggest to him to get him out of the funk? I'm not sure what else I can do as a wing-woman at this point.

suggest to him that everyone, EVERYONE hates sitting around with a mope that whines about their own bad luck with women.

I think the bigger problem is that sits around with a mop. If Dick Van Dyke ever taught me anything, its that chimney sweeps get all the girls.

In all seriousness, I think you guys are on the right track. He needs to get hanging out with "unfriends" of the opposite sex just to get the juices flowing.

[DropEmJayBird]

He's just not getting to his game.

[columbia]

I don't think he has any game.

[DropEmJayBird]

I think the bar scene is the worst place for some guys... I would much prefer going to a bar with a pre set group that I was going to interact with. Person A brings their friends, Person B brings the guy... and you talk. It's a networking thing. Sure the "one" might not be in person A's group... but maybe someone in that group knows another person. The other benefit is that it always gives you a connection to find out how things went rather than the group of randoms you may never see again.

[Pavel Bure]

I think the bar scene is the worst place for some guys... I would much prefer going to a bar with a pre set group that I was going to interact with. Person A brings their friends, Person B brings the guy... and you talk. It's a networking thing. Sure the "one" might not be in person A's group... but maybe someone in that group knows another person. The other benefit is that it always gives you a connection to find out how things went rather than the group of randoms you may never see again.

Yeah the whole bar pick up thing is really a farce. Go to a bar, you really don't see that happening. The people you do see doing it are usually pretty scummy dudes and IF it works on girls the girls are typicaly not very desirable. I met my wife through a group outing at a bar. She was a friend of a friend but it wasn't like I walked up to her out of the blue. It was just a group of friends BSing and we happened to have a connection.

[eddysnake]

met my wife in a bar. She had a boyfriend, I invaded, rest is history as they say.

[Pavel Bure]

met my wife in a bar. She had a boyfriend, I invaded, rest is history as they say.

Alpha male alert! Alpha male alert!

[MalkinIsMyHomeboy]

met my wife in a bar. She had a boyfriend, I invaded, rest is history as they say.

dick move brah

[DropEmJayBird]

I think the bar matters as well...

Some of the places I went to wanted to be dance clubs, even though they were just bars.
Blasting music at 10pm makes it damn near impossible to actually meet someone.

I would imagine it's much easier to talk to someone at an actual bar, go somewhere nice... don't go to a dive.

[Pavel Bure]

I think the bar matters as well...

Some of the places I went to wanted to be dance clubs, even though they were just bars.
Blasting music at 10pm makes it damn near impossible to actually meet someone.

I would imagine it's much easier to talk to someone at an actual bar, go somewhere nice... don't go to a dive.

It's one of the reasons a group of us quit going to Rivertowne in Monroeville. You'd walk in there on Saturday night at like 9PM and they'd have a DJ with music so loud you couldn't even order a drink. There is no dance floor in that place. It sucked then, and we went back recently because some friends were in from out of town. It was the same thing and it sucked. I ended up sitting outside at their patio for the majority of the time. I apologized to some of the people that stayed inside but I just couldn't take the thumping and not being able to hear anyone.

[obhave]

The one good bar we had at college was luckily not like that, so I never got used to it and hate to go the places like that. I much rather sit and enjoy my drink and actually hear people talk. Plus, all those types of bars are filled with annoying BC, BU, and other college bros.

[blackjack68]

met my wife in a bar. She had a boyfriend, I invaded, rest is history as they say.

Same.

Country western bar.

Other guy couldn't two-step or 10-step.

21 years later...still married.